Damocles Archives - Page 3 of 37 - Alex's Asteroid Astrology

August 9th, 2024 at 08:56am by Alex Miller

Asteroid Sleuth: The Case of the Baneful Bulge

On August 3^rd, 2024, aspiring Olympian Anthony Ammirati coined a whole new meaning for the term “cockblocked” after failing to qualify for a pole vault event when his penis collided with the bar on the way down, knocking it to the ground (the bar, not his penis). The embarrassing footage of the phallic fail immediately went viral, and though Olympic authorities later confirmed that Ammirati would have been disqualified regardless, as other, less intimate portions of his anatomy had touched the bar prior to its dickish dislodgment, there was no stopping the cock-a-hoop hilarity that ensued. The French athlete, with no apparent irony, later described the incident as “a big disappointment.” Cheer up, Anthony – a manly manhood has its compensations!

July 25th, 2024 at 08:58am by Alex Miller

Kamala Harris: Born to Succeed?

When Kamala Harris announced her run for president in 2019, she looked like a long shot. And she was, with a troubled campaign that ended before the first primary votes were cast. But looking at her birth chart then, it seemed to me that she was going to get to the Oval Office at some point, however distant. When Joe Biden chose her as his running mate a year later, she took a major step towards that goal, and when they won that November, a giant leap was made.

But there were still a number of hurdles to cross in the race to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, such as waiting her turn after a successful re-elect gave Biden a second term (should that even occur), and then fending off Democratic competition for the open seat in 2028, and winning that election. US Vice Presidents don’t have a compelling track record of succeeding to the office, barring the death of the boss mid-term, and she still faced a strong headwind.

July 9th, 2024 at 09:18am by Alex Miller

Losing Their Heads: The Mars/Uranus/Algol Conjunction and the Republican National Convention

The Republican National Convention begins on July 15^th in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, and the timing couldn’t be more perfect. That date just happens to coincide with the precise triple conjunction of Mars, Uranus and Fixed Star Algol, all at 26 Taurus, conjoined the 24 Taurus Midheaven of Donald J. Trump, who will accept the GOP 2024 presidential nomination during the convention. Mars denotes resentment, anger, hatred and violence; Uranus suggests volatility, controversy, iconoclasm, fanaticism and insurrection; Algol forms the severed head of Medusa in the constellation Perseus, denoting both literal decapitation and metaphorically “losing one’s head.” If you can think of a better celestial thumbnail sketch of the modern GOP and its felon champion, I’d like to hear it.

June 27th, 2024 at 09:23am by Alex Miller

Asteroid Sleuth: The Case of the Downsized Don

At 3:30 PM EDT on the afternoon of 12 June 2024, 86-year-old Anthony “Tony Cakes” Conigliaro walked into the crossing at 92^nd Street and Dahlgren Place in Brooklyn, NY, against a “Do Not Walk” sign. He never made it across. At least, parts of him did, but Tony Cakes was struck by a local Department of Transportation truck turning the corner, crushed and decapitated, with his severed head lying several yards away from his crumpled body.

June 24th, 2024 at 09:25am by Alex Miller

Aster-Obit: Willie Mays

On 18 June 2024, baseball legend Willie Mays passed away, at age 93. Mays’ pro sports career began in high school with the Birmingham Black Barons, a local Negro League team, but he was picked up by the New York Giants upon graduation, spending 23 seasons in the MLB before retiring in 1973. Mays was the 1951 Rookie of the Year, and MVP for the 1954 season which brought the Giants their last World Series win before moving to San Francisco. MVP again in 1965, Mays played in two more World Series, and was chosen as an All-Star 24 times, tying the record set by Stan Musial, exceeded only by Hank Aaron. Mays spent most of his career with the Giants, but was traded to the NY Mets in 1972; he retired the following year, but continued with the organization as a coach until 1980.

June 20th, 2024 at 08:55am by Alex Miller

Asteroid Sleuth: The Case of the Man-Killing Manure

Folks, this story is the shit! Literally. In the late morning of 13 June 2024, two men died in a manure tanker accident at Champion Dairy Farm in Kirkland, NY; both were volunteer firefighters. Nathan Doody, 33, was attempting to retrieve a piece of equipment that had fallen into the tanker, became overcome with fumes from the fermenting feces, and fell into the tank. Coworker Tyler Memory, 29, tried to assist, but also swooned and fell. Farm personnel called 911, the pair were recovered and medevacked to Wynn Hospital in nearby Utica, where they were pronounced dead.