Headlines Archives - Page 5 of 58 - Alex's Asteroid Astrology

May 15th, 2024 at 11:22am by Alex Miller

As the Worm Turns: RFK Jr’s Doomed Presidential Bid

The New York Times broke a story on May 8, 2024 that might just explain the antics of presidential hopeful Robert F. Kennedy Jr, currently polling as much as 15-20% in some key battleground states. While Kennedy is unlikely to reach his goal of the Oval Office sans major party affiliation, such numbers, should they materialize at the polls in November, could decisively swing the 2024 election one way or another. The Times story revealed a statement made by Kennedy in 2012, where he alleged that the “brain fog” and memory loss he had experienced two years prior had been “caused by a worm that got into my brain and ate a portion of it and then died.” Well, that explains a lot!

May 6th, 2024 at 08:52am by Alex Miller

Jupiter/Uranus Conjunction Fallout: The American College Protests

As many of you know, I don’t much bother with the planetary patterns of the day. I mean, I know they’re up there, I just find planetary astrology so frickin’ boring. Like always getting the fried chicken on a buffet that includes so much more. And there are plenty of other astrologers covering that base, no need for me to weigh in.

So when protests against the Israeli conduct in their war on Hamas began to erupt on college and university campuses across the US in mid-April, I cast a jaundiced eye skyward to see what was up. Inescapable was the conjunction between Jupiter and Uranus on April 20^th, and my atrophied planetary keyword brain mused, ‘Jupiter = higher education, Uranus = protest.’ I halfheartedly looked for asteroids that would match the nascent story, but found little, so I yawned, rolled over, and went back to celestial slumber.

April 30th, 2024 at 09:41am by Alex Miller

Asteroid Sleuth: The Case of the Gruesome Governor

South Dakota Governor and 2024 Republican Vice-Presidential nominee hopeful Kristi Noem was splashed across the news in late April, when an advance copy of her new book, “No Going Back” was obtained by The Guardian. In it, Noem recounts the story of how she executed her 14-month-old wirehaired pointer puppy Cricket, after she had proved herself to be irrepressibly joyful and an inadequate hunting dog. Two being better than one, Noem went on to slay a family goat that was smelly and had been annoying her and her children with head butts.

April 26th, 2024 at 03:35pm by Alex Miller

A Pecker in the Hand Is Worth Two in the Box

The witness box, that is. And the pecker in question is David Pecker, National Enquirer publisher, long-time Trump friend and political ally, and currently exhibit A in the Manhattan DA’s criminal case against the former US president. Everybody knew that Pecker, once he’d gone soft on Trump, was gonna spew, but nobody knew how hard he could make it for The Donald. (And that’s the last of the cheap double entendres you’ll get from me in this article. Maybe.)

April 23rd, 2024 at 03:48pm by Alex Miller

Man Self-Immolates Outside Trump Trial

On Friday, 21 April 2024, just across the street from the Manhattan courtroom where jury selection in Donald Trump’s hush money trial had recently concluded, a man set himself alight, first dousing himself with a liquid accelerant. Police responded immediately, being onsite for courthouse protection, but were unable to stop the flames for several minutes; the man was later pronounced dead at a local burn center.

April 17th, 2024 at 09:08am by Alex Miller

Trump Trial #1 Begins

The first of Donald Trump’s four pending criminal trials began on Monday, 15 April 2024, with jury selection. Perhaps not coincidentally, it was also Tax Day, and without doubt, the ordeal of Trump on trial will be taxing for us all. Trump kicked off the event with a series of his trademark untruths as he bloviated to reporters before entering the Manhattan courtroom for his trial’s appointed start time of 9:30 AM EDT. The former president characterized the proceedings as “persecution,” “an attack on a political opponent,” and “an assault on America,” averring that “every legal scholar says this case is nonsense” and an “outrage.”

None of that is true, but Trump did state one accurate fact: “Nothing like this has ever happened before, there’s never been anything like it.” Indeed, this is the first criminal prosecution of a former US president and current presidential candidate in history. Congrats, Donnie! You’ve just set two new records!