Asteroid Astrology: Headlines

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The First 2024 Presidential Debate

“Step right up, ladies and gentlemen!  Step right up to the Greatest Shitshow on Earth!  Ya pays your money, ya takes your chance!  What will it be?  Who will you choose – the Felon or the Feeb?”  So says the Cosmic Carnival Barker to promote the first (and now likely only) 2024 US Presidential debate.  For incumbent Joe Biden, it was an unmitigated disaster, which is an apt word for an astrologer to use, since its literal meaning is “against the stars.”

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The Hunter Biden Guilty Verdict

On 11 June 2024, Hunter Biden, son of US President Joe Biden, was convicted in a Wilmington, Delaware courtroom on three felony counts related to drug use and gun possession.  US Department of Justice Special Counsel David Weiss brought the case, stemming from an October 2018 purchase where Biden lied about his drug use to obtain a firearm.  Charged with unlawfully possessing a gun as a drug user, lying on a federal form when he bought the gun, and making a false statement about information required to be collected by a federally licensed gun dealer, the jury took less than three hours to decide that Biden was guilty, after a trial lasting six days.

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Guilty! Justice Comes for Trump

At last!  Some level of accountability for the biggest criminal scofflaw ever to infest the Oval Office.  Fond of setting records, on 30 May 2024 Donald J. Trump entered the history books yet again, as the only former US President, and presumptive GOP nominee, to be convicted of a felony.  And not just one – the jury returned a unanimous guilty verdict on each of the 34 criminal counts against him.

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Helicopter Crash Kills Iranian President Raisi

On 19 May 2024, Ebrahim Raisi, president of Iran since 2021, was killed when his helicopter crashed in a remote region of the country, near the village of Uzi.  Dense forests and thick fog impeded rescue efforts for up to twelve hours; by the time the wreckage was reached, there were no survivors.  Also among the eight who died was Iran’s Foreign Minister Hossein Amir-Abdollahian.  A former cleric and Muslim jurist, Raisi had been nicknamed the “Butcher of Tehran” for the part he played as deputy prosecutor general during the infamous 1988 “death commissions” and executions of Iranian political prisoners; for this and other offenses United Nations special rapporteurs accused him of crimes against humanity.

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Asteroid Sleuth: The Case of the Flipped Flag

On 16 May 2024, the New York Times broke a story concerning US Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito, the gist of which gives another black eye to the fantasy that the SCOTUS, currently embattled by a string of ethics violations revelations, is actually a fair and impartial, nonpartisan body.  Apparently, during the interim between the January 6, 2021, Capitol insurrection and Joe Biden’s January 20th inauguration, Justice Alito flew the American flag at his home in Alexandria, Virginia, upside down. 

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As the Worm Turns: RFK Jr’s Doomed Presidential Bid

The New York Times broke a story on May 8, 2024 that might just explain the antics of presidential hopeful Robert F. Kennedy Jr, currently polling as much as 15-20% in some key battleground states.  While Kennedy is unlikely to reach his goal of the Oval Office sans major party affiliation, such numbers, should they materialize at the polls in November, could decisively swing the 2024 election one way or another.  The Times story revealed a statement made by Kennedy in 2012, where he alleged that the “brain fog” and memory loss he had experienced two years prior had been “caused by a worm that got into my brain and ate a portion of it and then died.”  Well, that explains a lot!

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